Raisin Bread: I Can Bake (with a Bread Machine)

My interest in reading recipes started back in the days when I was still in school — when buying grocery, cooking and doing dishes were more for fun than for need.

Sometimes these Asian moms would blog about the bread that they conveniently made at home using a bread machine.  Red bean bread.  Wheat bread.  Sesame bread.  It was like magic; you poured the ingredients into the pan, pressed a button, and then here came the bread.

I showed my sister all these bread recipes and kept telling her what fancy bread I would like to make.  At some point, she must have been very impressed (or annoyed), so she bought me a bread machine so that I could stop talking and start baking.

And isn’t that right.  What sometimes makes a product interesting is simply because you do not have it yet.  Making bread with a bread machine was not that simple when I had to make a trip to the supermarket just for the bread and clean up afterward.  I had used the bread machine once, and then it became a decoration in my kitchen.

Recently, I wanted to give the bread machine another try.  And I finally got around to working on it yesterday.

My raisin bread fresh out of the oven machine!

My favorite part about this raisin bread is that it has a lot of raisin.  (I apparently did not follow the recipe and added extra raisin.)  However, with one tbsp of butter, the bread smells and tastes too buttery to me; I will try to greatly reduce the butter amount in the future.

How come people make raisin bread but not dried longan bread?  I like longan, fresh or dried.  Perhaps I will create my own dried longan bread next time.

$2 Million. And $200 Million.

Yesterday, I read an article on American Express CEO getting a 60% pay raise.

Chenault, 58, will be paid $2 million a year, up from $1.25 million in 2009, the New York-based lender said today in a regulatory filing.

“Wow.  $2 million!  CEO is actually paid so much,” I thought.

Later the day, I read an article on the US government deciding the site for the 9/11 trial.

Bloomberg has estimated the cost of security for the Sept. 11 trials to be at least $200 million a year and has asked the Obama administration to pick up the tab.

“Wow.  $200 million!  It actually costs so much to have a trial,” I thought.

In The Little Prince, by Antoine de Saint-Exupery, the little prince claims that adults love numbers.

Grown-ups like numbers… If you tell grown-ups, ‘I saw a beautiful red brick house, with geraniums at the windows and doves on the roof…,’ they wont be able to imagine such a house.  You have to tell them, ‘I saw a house worth a hundred thousand frances.’  Then they exclaim, ‘What a pretty house!’

The little prince is right.  Adults love numbers.  Because numbers let us compare and sort things in a systematic and relative manner  However, the little prince does not know that sometimes numbers only let us quantify but does not necessarily provide any meaning conceptually.

What does 2 million mean?  And what about 200 million?  An astronomist (or the Amex CEO or the US government) can easily understand these numbers, but to me, these are astronomical figures.  Coincidentally, $200 million is 100 times $2 million; they are of very different scales from a cost perspective.  But what type of lifestyle will having $2 million a year bring?  What incremental differences will $200 million bring comparing $2 million?

It does not help to say $2 million can buy us a $2-million house every year whereas $200 million will buy me 200 houses.  Because we do not need one house per year, not to say 200.

While we may handle large numbers at work, we may not be used to operating in the million range on a personal setting.  On the other hand, if we are told that we can spend $2 versus $200 per day, we will immediately understand what they mean.  We can relate and apply these numbers to our daily activities.  With $200 per day, I can eat decently well for two days and still have money left to buy the musical instrument that I have wanted.  With only $2, however, it means that I better stay home and eat oatmeal for all meals.

On a related note, I often have a hard time guessing the height, weight, or age of an individual whose number is very different from mine.  To me, someone who is 6′ 1″ is tall.  6′ 2″ is tall.  6′ 3″ is tall.  The subtle differences between having those heights are hard to comprehend when my height falls within a totally different range.

Next time, you may ask me to guess your height, weight or age.  This type of game is risky; there is always a chance of offending people.  And I may give you a number that is way off.  It is because I cannot really tell, so I may as well provide a safe and satisfying answer.

Love is Blind, But the Resulting Parenthood is Blinder

Don’t get me wrong.  I love kids.  They are curious, genuine and energetic.  It puts a smile on your face when you see a smile on their face.

You may think that I am writing this post out of bitterness since I do not have kids, which in many cases get people the ultimate bragging rights.  Or I am disconnected with the feelings of being a parent because I have never experienced that wonderful stage of life.

But really, I have no problems with kids.  I only have problems with parents who keep emphasizing that their kids are taller or more intelligent than the other kids of the same age.

It is totally understandable and in fact expected to form a special bond with your own children.  They are the joy and the pride in your eyes.  However, logically speaking, how is it possible that every single kid is smarter than his or her peers?

“He knows many words even though he is only two.  He knows the word ‘conversation.’”  “She is only three, but she can already read by herself.  Usually kids around her age can’t.”  “Oh, he is ruling the class at daycare.”  “She looks like she is older than her friends in this picture.  Actually, they are around the same age.  My daughter is taller than many of her classmates.”

You can be happy and amazed by how quickly children — I mean, your children — grow and learn.  In fact, I am too.  And you may have your own ideas on how to best raise and educate them.  However, if you believe your kids are objectively better and notice that all the parents around you feel the same for their children, perhaps all of you parents should get together and re-define where the average line should be drawn.

Sometimes, it is interesting to hear parents reciting anecdotes, reading into each small detail, connecting the dots and explaining how it shows some superior intelligence possessed by their children.  Many people are turned into inference experts after they have become parents.  Love is blind.  But apparently, the resulting parenthood can make people even blinder.

In some cases, I find the parents’ reaction peculiar too.  A kid misbehaves, is bossy, or provides a rude response.  “We were so surprised, and we all laughed,” the parent cannot stop laughing even when he or she is reciting it.  Now I feel bad for the kid, who has got mixed signals.  What is encouraged?  What is discouraged?  Doing it once may be funny, but doing it twice or three times?  And to someone who is not the parent?

Rules and systems are like baking recipes.  If you do not even know what each ingredient is for and why each step is needed, how will you know when to break the rules or create new ones in the future?

“I Love You” — Actually, Do I Really?

Today, I read this article which suggests that “iloveyou” is one of the most popular passwords.  It reminds me of this post from about a year ago, where I blogged about “I Love You” being a phrase that people often say but do not mean.  Also, while “iloveyou” is ranked #5, its sibling “iloveu” also appears on the list as #21.

Is “I Love You” too commonly used that it has lost its original meaning?  Has it already become a commonplace?

By the way, notice that all the popular passwords are either positive or neutral.  There are no cuss words, even though they are common in conversation.  Is the published result censored?  Or are people actually not as interested in swearing as they may appear?

Nicole.  Daniel.  Jessica.  Michael.  While these names are popular, they are not the most popular.  According to the Census, there are a lot more Marys, Lindas, James’es and Johns in US.  However, it just happens that Nicoles, Daniels, Jessicas and Michaels are way more naive and trusting; they believe that there are no hackers so it is fine to simply use their first name as password.  Or they may tend to sell themselves short, thinking that their data is worthless so nobody would hack into it.

唔怕生壞命,最怕改壞名.  (Being born with a bad destiny is not nearly as dreadful as having an unsuitable name.)  Chinese believe that one’s personality and luck are influenced by his or her name.  For this particular instance, perhaps they are right.

“Cautious Optimism” — A Bittersweet Equilibrium

“It sounds like the language that those shady econ forecasters use in their newsletter,” a friend commented after she had seen my message on the term cautiously optimistic.

Yes, I like this phrase.  And she is right.  I saw it being used twice in the last couple days, and both cases were related to economic forecast.  Surprisingly, I have not noticed this term before.  When a concept makes much sense and applies to you, however, it is harder to not pay attention.

I like the term cautiously optimistic because of its broad applicability.  It delineates the bittersweet facet of optimism, which inevitably exists for individuals who have experienced loss, disappointment, frustration, or failure.  Once we have sampled from across the entire spectrum of feelings, we may become more cautious in spending our happiness.  After all, if only we can fully control any gain or pain.

Being cautiously optimistic is an equilibrium — a preferable one, too.  Simply being optimistic, however, is an ephemeral stage.  When you are cautiously optimistic and watching others who are purely optimistic, it is like parents being worried about their naive children.  Will they fall and get hurt?  What if they are cheated or manipulated?  Are they too gullible?  At some point, children will bring home the first taste of bitterness, a heartbreak, or a big wound.  You can only hope that they will know how to get back up, learn from their lessons and still remain optimistic — though more cautiously — in the future.

Pure optimism is like a mother’s womb.  It is where we all begin, but once we have left, we can never go back.

A friend suggests that we are ephemeral but hopefully more ephemeral than our actions and our legacy.  Perhaps she is right.  And I wish that my cautious optimism will walk with me on this ephemeral path till the end.

A Calling

Last Saturday night, after the 6.5 M_w earthquake at Eureka following an earthquake at Milpitas, my sister chatted with me about earthquake preparedness.  While we were chatting, my dad called and asked whether I had food and water at home for emergency.  “Also, prepare a backpack with some cash, food, water, a torch, etc.  In case if you need to escape, wear a jacket and grab your backpack,” he added.  Before I went to bed, my mom and my brother called me from Hong Kong; they were on the train and saw the news on the earthquake in Northern California.

I chuckled at a friend’s comment on the last post that I would make a good wife and a good mom.  At my age, it is definitely positive to have such a reputation.  However, I realize that it is merely an image — isn’t being well prepared to take care of the family an important quality of a good mother?  I am not even sure if I have been taking good care of myself.  My parents and my siblings, on the other hand, know me well.  They knew that I would need to be reminded.  In retrospect, I am surprised that I have been living by myself for more than six years without even having a flashlight at home.

After the Haiti earthquake, my dad called me again to discuss earthquake preparedness.  Therefore, yesterday I finally made an effort to shop for items that would be needed in case of emergency.  What if the earthquake was not in Eureka but closer to where I live?  Why was the earthquake in Haiti, where a lot of people were already living in poverty?  What if there was a natural disaster and I was totally unprepared — would I regret at that moment?  I had many questions as I was pushing the cart through the aisles at Target.  And then, I felt very thankful.

Natural disasters can happen anywhere.  I feel thankful that I can be sitting here, delineating my thoughts and feelings.  I feel thankful that I still have the ability to donate.  When it comes to altruism, I often recall what my friend told me.  One time, while we were discussing being volunteers, I told her that sometimes I felt bad because I felt good about myself for helping others.  If someone was purely altruistic, in my opinion, he or she would feel happy for others because of the improvement in their conditions, but his or her self-image would not change at all.  My friend replied, “It is just part of human nature that we feel good about ourselves after we have helped others.  Actually, it is good that God has included this feeling in human nature, so that more of us will respond to the calling to help others.”

Therefore, my dear friends, I ask that you respond to your inner calling, whether it is purely altruistic or not.

Last but not least, a very special thanks to a friend, who personally matched my donation before helping process the sum for another gift matching, so that my donation had increased fourfold!

Banana Smoothie from Homemade Soymilk

Eating healthily has become one of my goals habits.  Or perhaps I really did have too much time.  Last Friday morning, when everyone was recovering from all the New Year Eve partying, I woke up early and made soymilk from scratch.

I bought some organic soybeans and used this recipe.  In the first try, I added black sesame powder to the soymilk.  In the second try, I followed these instructions and made banana smoothie with black sesame.  In my opinion, black sesame and banana is a good combination; neither is dominated by the other and their flavors match well.  Also, I did not have to add sugar since there was already natural sweetness from the banana.  Below is a picture of the smoothie.

The unidentified floating objects are actually banana slices.  Originally, I wanted to make a flower pattern with five slices of banana, which were floating (because of surface tension?) at first.  However, when I tried to fix the placement of the “petals,” I messed it up even more so they started sinking.

Special thanks to my sister, who made this experiment possible by lending me her blender.

Grasping the Most Beautiful Dream

As a formality, on my first post in 2010, I feel that I should write something about the previous year.  After all, 2009 has been an important year to me.

Having been sitting in front of my computer for half an hour and still drawing a blank, I realize how difficult it is to put all my thoughts and feelings into words.  But even if the message is incomplete and not well written, it is okay.  I have learned to be more lenient with myself — the importance of forgiving myself is actually one of my new realizations.

If I were to use a word to summarize 2009, it would be change.  People who know that I changed my job may think that I am referring to my career.  But ironically, deep down in my heart, I would think that career is the one category which had undergone the fewest changes in the previous year.  My overall attitude towards my career has remained the same, and these in my opinion are much more crucial than a change in company.

Songs are like friends; the number goes down with age, but meanwhile each of them is worth a lot more to you.  The following two songs have played an important role in my life, accompanying me through the most difficult time in 2009.

Better In Time, which gets better in time.  A song that I have liked since 2008, it has outcompeted 2009.

給未來的自己 (To the Me of the Future)

I especially like these parts of the lyrics.

在星光裏遺忘昨天的傷害 / 一覺醒來還有期待
(Underneath the starry sky, I forget the wounds and hurts from yesterday.
When I wake up in the morning, each new day is full of hope.)

我不放棄愛的勇氣　我不懷疑會有真心
我要握住　一個最美的夢　給未來的自己
(I won’t give up the courage to love.  I won’t doubt the existence of truthfulness.
I need to grasp the most beautiful dream for the me of the future.)

不管怎樣　怎樣都會受傷
傷了又怎樣　至少我很堅強　我很坦蕩
(I may get hurt regardless.
Even if I get hurt, but so what.  At least I am strong and magnanimous.)

Never One Too Many

This article discusses the irrational behaviors of some shoppers (and note that returns and exchanges are often not honored in Hong Kong.)

一個人決定買，其他人就馬上心思思，「我不買的話不是太笨了嗎，也不是很多錢，十來廿塊，買就買啦。」

(Once a shopper has decided to make the purchase, others will immediately think, “Wouldn’t I be missing out if I don’t buy it as well?  After all, it is not that expensive, just ten or twenty bucks.  Okay I will get it too!”)

It reminds me of a funny story that took place when my sister and I went to Hong Kong last time.

There was a special discount section on the uppermost floor of Sogo, and the theme of the products would be changed once a week.  One day, we saw that women’s clothes and shoes were on sale — Sogo is usually already too crowded, so you can imagine how packed it was on that day.

My sister and I were thrifty and smart shoppers.  Without anything particular that I wanted to buy, I was just leisurely browsing even though my sister might be worried that I would buy more on top of the x tops, y pairs of pants, z pairs of shoes and w blazers which I had already purchased.

As we walked by the shoes department and saw many women frantically finding their perfect pairs, I decided to play a trick.  I randomly pointed to a yellow shoe on display and told my sister affirmatively, “Why don’t you get this pair of shoes?  So cute and versatile.  It will match perfectly with both pants and skirts.  Elegantly feminine and yet casual.”

I deliberately enunciated and slightly raised my voice so that the middle-aged woman standing next to my sister could hear me clearly.  Noticing the subtle difference in my tone, my sister realized my motive and wanted to give me a meaningful glance.  However, even before my sister turned around, that woman had already grabbed the shoe from the display and started scrutinizing it.  Her reaction was so immediate, as if it was the last pair and my sister would take it if she did not act fast.  My sister and I were too amused, so we had to walked away quickly before we burst out laughing.

Are you kidding me?  If I see a pair of shoes that I like, I will immediately grab it from the shelf without a word.  Why would I be engaging in this salesperson type of talk?  After all, just like drinking, an additional pair of shoes is never one too many.

Happily Ever After — For the Restaurant, Too

A great and very interesting marketing strategy in my opinion.

As part of the package, a restaurant in Hong Kong may present a gift to the couple who holds the wedding banquet at the location.  Instead of providing some expensive, fancy present, an upscale restaurant is offering the couple anniversary dinner, with a generous limit, for the following five years.

How many of the couples will forgo the five free dinners?  And among those who have celebrated their wedding and the first five anniversaries at the same restaurant, how many of them will actually go elsewhere for their sixth anniversary?

Five years is a good duration to establish a habit, whether it is for the memory or superstition.  After a marriage has been maintained for the first five years, you will hope for the second five years of togetherness, the third five years, and so on.

Sometimes you know the strategy, but it may still be difficult to avoid the scheme.